oh boooyyyy

geez, am I awful with this thing.  I swear I want to use it more to document my life with my little family but, I can just never

a) remember that its here

b) find time between naps, cleaning, working out (trying at least) and living my oh so exciting life (no sarcasm there right?...) (....or there :) )

and

c) come up with things to write about... my life is SO exciting.. i just never know where to start.  With the morning feeding?  The afternoon nap? taking the dogs out to go potty?  I know all of that is SO exciting! 

sike!

yes... I pulled that out.  I know you're jealous.


aaanyways.  We just got home from a little family vacation in Maine.  It was nice and semi-relaxing.  Tenley did an awesome job the whole trip even though we ripped her from her sweet little schedule at home.  I was very happy. : )  I'll make a longer post about that tomorrow... or monday.  One of the two... I swear!  I even have pictures!

Tomorrow is a big day for my hubby and I.  We are going to start working out.  Not really dieting since we eat as well as I think we can possibly eat.... but the working out part is definitely lacking.  I'll start documenting that as well.  I HAVE to document that becuase it is really the only way I can hold us accountable for it. 

Already (well, starting two days ago), we are going on a daily walk with the babe and the poochies.  Family time.. how sweet.  We live in a nice little community, so our walks are actually pretty relaxing. 

I also have decided I'm going to go back to school.  I dont know if I want to go back to just get teaching credentials or if I want to get my masters at the same time.  I have to look at the options first.  I am pretty excited about it.  carpe diem right?  I am pretty excited.  I LOVE school.  I know, I am a major geek...but i love it.  I do.  I love learning.  I can keep updates about that little journey too.

Maybe that now I can actually start doing things with my day other that nap when Tenley naps and feed her, I will actually have something to update on here. 


Oh... and speaking of things to update about.  This is what Tenley and I did on that day the world was supposed to end.  chilled on our patio. It was GORGEOUS outside... GORGEOUS i say!!

oooooh how I love this little bird.  she is so cute!!!

big changes

SO much has happened since the last time I updated this thing. 

1. Tenley ROLLED OVER!!!  It was SUPER exciting for me!  I caught it all on camera too!!  We were playing on the bed and she was squirming around and I washelping her roll over.  Then all of a sudden when she was on her belly, she rolled over to her back.  I thought maybe it was just a lucky chance because we have a really squishy bed and duvet cover, so I put her in her crib.  She was on her belly for a little bit, then she rolled over again!  I put her on her belly two more times and both times she rolled over!  I was so proud of her!  It is really the little things that makes mommy's hearts melt!

2. I officially left my company.  I told my boss I would not be returning to work and am now officially a SAHM. 

3. Tom and I are moving back to california at the end of July.  It is going to be kind of a stressful move, being that he and I will be travelling separately becuase I dont want to drive with Tenley, but I dont want to doggies to fly; but it is a much needed move.  I cant wait to get back home.

4. Tenley laughed out loud!!!!  She smiles ALL the time, but yesterday was the first time she let out a giggle... then a laugh!  We were playing on mommy and daddy's bed and I was making her do tummy time on mommy's tummy, then she rolled off on to the bed.  I flopped her back on my belly and said, "get back up here!" and she just started laughing!  It is the CUTEST laugh everrrrr!!  I tried to call daddy at work and leave him a message with her laughing but she stopped by time the message started recording.  Later on at night though daddy was holding her and she was getting sandwich kisses on both sides of her neck by mommy and daddy and she started laughing again!  Seriously, her laugh makes me just melt!

I woke up not feeling so hot today, so I think I am going to finish my tea and then do some work out action while Tenley sleeps in her swing.  We have a fun couple of weekends coming up.. this weekend is my friend Lauren's wedding and the following weekend, we are going to be spending a long holiday in Maine.  Should be fun fun fun : )

technical errors

So you know how the only computer I have is a netbook?  Well, a couple of days ago my netbook fell on the floor off of my couch (what, one, maybe two feet. max?) and it completely fried.  I have been without a computer for almost 3 days.  I was in the middle of such a nice post about the beautiful day Tenley and I had too.  I'll have to finish that later.

The weather has been gorgeous and I love it.  love. love. love. love it. 

Tom has a 4 day weekend this weekend, so we are enjoying some family time.  much needed family time.  Soo I probably wont get to updating until at least tuesday. 

this is just a pop in to say I am still breathing. 

extras

the hubs took this last night of me and the munchkie.  i love her. : )  she was being shy peeking over my arm at daddy.



and this one i took a couple of days ago.  I dressed her like a ballerina and stuck her on a blanket..and she started dancing.  she's so cute!

have a good easter!!



all my eggs

happy easter everyone!!  my little family had a little photoshoot today.  here is just a couple.... more to come later.

have a fabulous day!

3 months

my little munchkin is 3 months old.

at three months you:

• smile at your mommy and daddy all of the time
• are starting to laugh out loud and it is the cutest thing ever
• love sitting up and anticipating it when I count to three
• Adele's 21 is your favorite CD.  When you're in the car and screaming, mommy can put it on super loud and you'll fall right asleep.
• have been to the Bronx Zoo, NYC, and the Statue of Liberty/Ellis Island
• copy mommy when she makes raspberry sounds with her mouth
• have slept through the night....once.
• are grabbing things and putting them in your mouth
• bite mommy's hands when you hold them
• had you're first little taste of frozen custard  at Shake Shack... not sure how much you liked it though.

You have hit so many milestones this month and mommy and daddy are so proud of you.  I love you little munchie munch.

tummy time

We have fun during tummy time.  Tenley hates being on her tummy when she isn't propped up at least a little bit, but when she is propped up, she has a ton of fun.

i love all the little faces she makes. : )

munchkie

I've got a bug.  I feel like crap.  Today is a sleep day. : ( 

This makes me happy.

I love her more than a fat kid loves cake. 

break

I've been out of the bloggy world the past couple of days.  I have a good reason too.  We have had some family friends over at the house and the Hubs bas had some time off.  So we have been enjoying good family time. 

We didn't do much, but yesterday we went into NYC.  My camera was with me, yes, but I turned it on to find that my night of battery charging did nothing.  I was a little irritated, but got over it and moved on. 

I will be back tomorrow.

Tenley is 3 months today. : )  She weighs 11 lbs and 23.5".  She is a little pipsqueek and I love her. : )

slow down little girl!!

literally yesterday I blogged about Tenley starting to grab for things. Well, she has gone from kind of grabbing things to full on grabbing them and putting them in her mouth all in a matter of two days!!

She is growing up too fast. : ( It makes me want to cry.

Here she is doing a 'push up' too. 

And as promised yesterday, a picture of her holding her hands while she is in her swing.  I didn't get her sleeping, but she did fall asleep after this and was in the same position.  I was too busy crying about how big she was getting to take any pictures.

I can't believe how big she is getting.  She isn't even 3 months yet!! 

Today I also got her 'walking' on video.  She wasn't really walking, but she likes to 'stand', meaning she can hold up her body weight, but is just too wobbly because of her big head : ).  I help her up 'sanding' on our living room floor, and she started taking steps!  It was the cutest thing...but at the same time I was crying because it's another thing that shows me just how fast she is growing up.  : (

Goodness help me.  I am going to be a mess when she actually does grown up things, like kindergarten...

look at her go!

Untitled from chrystal ziebart on Vimeo.

spring!

Being born and raised on the west coast you get used to the 'seasons'.  Which, there really are none.  I love it. 

Now living on the east coast, you really have seasons and they are strange.  Right now we are in Spring, but it has been raining all. of. the. time.  Which is kind of a downer.  Especially because I need the sunshine. 

Today was a different story.  It was beautiful outside!  The sun was shining.  The birds were chirping.  It was about 70 outside! 

So what did I do?  I opened up all the windows in the house and I cleaned.  and cleaned.  and cleaned some more.  Tenley took a super nap in the middle of the day and I was able to get down and dirty.  It was nice.

Sometimes spring cleaning feels so good. 

I'm sure it's going to rain again tomorrow.  I can't wait until the sun stays out consistently... or until we get back on the west coast.  I miss it. 

If I had been back in California, today I would have gone to the beach.  and I would have taken a nap. 

My little sweet pea is sleeping right now.  She has started holding her hands together when she sleeps.  It is totally the cutest.  I'll put a picture of it up tomorrow if I'm able to get one.

Also...she is starting to grab for things.  I'll put up a video of it tomorrow as well. 

i love her.  ♥

day 06

day 06 - a picture of a person you'd love to trade places with for a day

....this is a tough one.  You only get one day afterall.  There isn't a whole lot you can do with a single day, but there is also a lot you can do with a day.

if I had to choose...I think I would have to be....

here's why -

• shes beautiful and has abs I would never. ever. have.... Ive tried, trust me. I haven't found something that's made it happen.
• she has great hair.... and though I think I have a great head of hair...I can never find someone who can cut it the way I like it...so I never like my hair.
• she's got loads of money...so of course I can do some sedrous shopping.
• I can actually get into her head about what happened with Brad Pitt... very lame reason, I know, but who wouldn't want to know this?!
• currently she is rumored to be dating Bradley Cooper.  He is my get out of jail free card.  He is really hot. : )

That's it for today!!



day 01 - a picture of yourself and ten facts
day 02 - a picture of you and the person you have been closest with the longest

day 03 - a picture of the cast from your favorite show

day 04 - a picture of your night
day 05 - a picture of your favorite memory
day 06 - a picture of a person you'd love to trade places with for a day
day 07 - a picture of your most treasured item
day 08 - a picture that makes you laugh
day 09 - a picture of the person who has gotten you through the most
day 10 - a picture of the person you do the most ****** up things with
day 11 - a picture of something you hate
day 12 - a picture of something you love
day 13 - a picture of your favorite band or artist
day 14 - a picture of someone you could never imagine your life without
day 15 - a picture of something you want to do before you die
day 16 - a picture of someone who inspires you
day 17 - a picture of something that has made a huge impact on your life recently
day 18 - a picture of your biggest insecurity
day 19 - a picture and a letter
day 20 - a picture of somewhere you'd love to travel
day 21 - a picture of something you wish you could forget
day 22 - a picture of something you wish you were better at
day 23 - a picture of your favorite book
day 24 - a picture of something you wish you could change
day 25 - a picture of your day
day 26 - a picture of something that means a lot to you
day 27 - a picture of yourself and a family member
day 28 - a picture of something you're afraid of
day 29 - a picture that can always make you smile
day 30 - a picture of someone you miss

old school.

Does anyone ever go back and read their journal from when they were in high school?  I didn't because I kept an online journal at Livejournal and I had completely forgot about it.

That was until a couple of days ago at my friends bridal shower. 

The groom's step mom had come over to us and was talking about her art and how it is hard to do something on canvas because it is so personal and it takes a lot of thought to put something down so meaningful and to have it open for the public.  My friends know I blog, but also know I have kept it secret because I am so open and its hard for me to share myself with other people, especially people I know.  My other friend Julia was talking about how she used to journal on Xanga and she was reading hers the other day and it dawned on me that I had a journal too. 

I came home and decided to go look up my old Livejournal account.  I don't remember my password and I definitely don't have the same email I did in high school, but I was still lucky enough to be able to read it. : )

it. was. so. funny.  but also kind of sad.  Looking at myself in high school made me think about a lot of things.

My high school self was...
a) not a very good friend to her friends...at all
b) a little too boy crazy for her own good
c) really bad at spelling...and speaking, er typing, in general... I said things like 'funner'
d) a really bad potty mouth... which at the time you don't know how lame you sound, but looking back, its kind of embarrassing
e) a huge dork
f) really out of touch with the important things...or pretty much everything if it wasn't boys.

I had a really weird outlook on life.  Its kind of surprising to see.  It makes me wonder if I am going to look back at this 10 years from now and think the same things about this 20 something Me. 

I hope not.

day 04 & 05

American Idol is on, so this is going to be short.  Gotta get my reality TV fix.


day 04 - a picture of your night

after i give Tenley a bath around 7pm... i put her in her PJ's and stick her in her swing to sleep for a while so I can get some TV time in.  She usually gives me this look of, "why am I in this thin again mom??".  She's cute.

day 05 - a picture of your favorite memory

This is from 2007...or maybe 2008.  I think 2008...March.  When I lived in Santa Barbara.  Every year a BUNCH of people got together dressed up like this and walked around visiting 18 different bars drinking different drinks trying to get the least number of points...and in doing which, would consume the most alcohol.  Pub Golf was the one of the most fun times I have ever had.  I'll miss you days of getting drunk without having to worry about being responsible.  

day 01 - a picture of yourself and ten facts
day 02 - a picture of you and the person you have been closest with the longest

day 03 - a picture of the cast from your favorite show

day 04 - a picture of your night
day 05 - a picture of your favorite memory
day 06 - a picture of a person you'd love to trade places with for a day
day 07 - a picture of your most treasured item
day 08 - a picture that makes you laugh
day 09 - a picture of the person who has gotten you through the most
day 10 - a picture of the person you do the most ****** up things with
day 11 - a picture of something you hate
day 12 - a picture of something you love
day 13 - a picture of your favorite band or artist
day 14 - a picture of someone you could never imagine your life without
day 15 - a picture of something you want to do before you die
day 16 - a picture of someone who inspires you
day 17 - a picture of something that has made a huge impact on your life recently
day 18 - a picture of your biggest insecurity
day 19 - a picture and a letter
day 20 - a picture of somewhere you'd love to travel
day 21 - a picture of something you wish you could forget
day 22 - a picture of something you wish you were better at
day 23 - a picture of your favorite book
day 24 - a picture of something you wish you could change
day 25 - a picture of your day
day 26 - a picture of something that means a lot to you
day 27 - a picture of yourself and a family member
day 28 - a picture of something you're afraid of
day 29 - a picture that can always make you smile
day 30 - a picture of someone you miss

apple of my eye

soooo, in a past post I talked about my computer situation.  I have a net book (which I use ALL the time, when I'm not on my phone) and a desktop.  My desktop doesn't have the Internet and hasn't been updated since I first bought it my sophomore year of college, which waaasss...hmmmmmm...... about 7 years ago (holy mooly!!!). 

My desktop has died.  It no longer turns on...at all. 

So naturally, I need a new one (never mind the fact that because it doesn't have the Internet, I NEVER use it). 

Now begins my journey of trying to convince my logical husband to let me shell out the cash to buy a Mac.  The last time I used a Mac was when computers first came out back in the 90's.  (Geez... I am really starting to feel old here) But I'm justifying it because I have recently moved into the world of photography and Apples are really good for artsy things... like editing pictures. 

The batteries in Tenley's swing JUST tuckered out too... right as I type this, so now I must rescue her from the sorry stationary swing.

wish me luck!!  (with the Mac, of course!!)

SOOC

sooo...since I am taking a swing at this whole taking really nice pictures thing...and since I got an account at Picnik.  I also took a stab at editing. 



SOOC



then...I actually edited with Picasa this time...not Picnik.

how did I do?  I changed the fill light to 50% and then increased the highlights by like 25%....Picnik doesn't have fill light and I don't know how to get the same effect with that program.   I'm still working on it. : )

bridal shower

so yesterday was my parents last day in New York.  We took them to the airport and then headed off to Lauren's bridal shower.  We were running late AND our GPS took us through Manhattan...which if you have ever been to Manhattan...walking is terrible.  Driving is hopeless.   not. fun. Thankfully, Tenley slept most of the time. 



Once we got to the house, which looked like it was out of a magazine, we enjoyed some appetizers and drinks (water for me of course).  Then we sat down in this BEAUTIFUL dining room and ate the yummiest meal that I have had in a long time.  Lauren opened gifts and got a lot of great stuff.  A couple pf my friends were there too.  They all help Ten, but I only got a picture of Val and her.  I am still shy about pulling out this giant camera to take pictures.  I'm working on it.  

We enjoyed some incredible dessert (1's' or 2?...I never know!...I am talking about the yummy sweet food you eat after dinner, not the dry sandy place).  Then we left.  It was a beautiful shower..and again, I wish I took more pictures while I was there.

note to self....Don't EVER leave somewhere thinking, "I wish I took more pictures"...get some guts and take pictures already! 

OK...now that I'm done yelling at myself..I am going to go enjoy the rest of this beautiful day!!

day 03

So since I didn't post yesterday, I figure I would make up for it today. : )

day 03 - a picture of the cast of your favorite show



So when I think about my favorite show... immediately my mind goes to reality TV.  Terrible, I know.  But its my guilty pleasure.  I love pretty much any and all reality TV...and the trashier the better.  Again, terrible... I know.  But when I think about shows that have a cast of people... a few shows come to mind.  I love funny TV.  How I Met Your Mother, The Office, Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Modern Family & The League are among some of my favorites.  Then there is this show.  Traffic Light.  Its a new show on Fox and I have just started getting into it.  It. Is. SO. Funny!  Definitely one of my favorite shows on TV right now.  I really suggest you check it out if you haven't seen it already.

Tomorrow is going to require me thinking a little bit more about what kind of picture I want to show.  Its going to be fun!

day 01 - a picture of yourself and ten facts
day 02 - a picture of you and the person you have been closest with the longestday 03 - a picture of the cast from your favorite show
day 04 - a picture of your night
day 05 - a picture of your favorite memory
day 06 - a picture of a person you'd love to trade places with for a day
day 07 - a picture of your most treasured item
day 08 - a picture that makes you laugh
day 09 - a picture of the person who has gotten you through the most
day 10 - a picture of the person you do the most ****** up things with
day 11 - a picture of something you hate
day 12 - a picture of something you love
day 13 - a picture of your favorite band or artist
day 14 - a picture of someone you could never imagine your life without
day 15 - a picture of something you want to do before you die
day 16 - a picture of someone who inspires you
day 17 - a picture of something that has made a huge impact on your life recently
day 18 - a picture of your biggest insecurity
day 19 - a picture and a letter
day 20 - a picture of somewhere you'd love to travel
day 21 - a picture of something you wish you could forget
day 22 - a picture of something you wish you were better at
day 23 - a picture of your favorite book
day 24 - a picture of something you wish you could change
day 25 - a picture of your day
day 26 - a picture of something that means a lot to you
day 27 - a picture of yourself and a family member
day 28 - a picture of something you're afraid of
day 29 - a picture that can always make you smile
day 30 - a picture of someone you miss

day 2

I didnt post yesterday because I was at a bridal shower for my dear friend Lauren.  I had lots of fun and Tenley, of course, was hamming up all the attention. : )  I didnt take many pictures from yesterday, but I do have one... update on the shower will come a wee bit later... first order of bizzz.


day 02 - a picture of you and the person you have been closest with the longest



Michela and me at a local bar called The Neighborhood


This is my best friend Michela.  I met her when I was a freshman in college.  We both worked together at PacSun and are like the same person.  She is a dancer and lover of cats.  She currently lives in North Carolina where she is going to UNC (go Tarheels!) and getting her masters in social work.  I am not the greatest person when it comes to keeping in contact, but she is always there for me whenever I need her.  She is the bestest. : )




day 01 - a picture of yourself and ten facts
day 02 - a picture of you and the person you have been closest with the longest
day 03 - a picture of the cast from your favorite show
day 04 - a picture of your night
day 05 - a picture of your favorite memory
day 06 - a picture of a person you'd love to trade places with for a day
day 07 - a picture of your most treasured item
day 08 - a picture that makes you laugh
day 09 - a picture of the person who has gotten you through the most
day 10 - a picture of the person you do the most ****** up things with
day 11 - a picture of something you hate
day 12 - a picture of something you love
day 13 - a picture of your favorite band or artist
day 14 - a picture of someone you could never imagine your life without
day 15 - a picture of something you want to do before you die
day 16 - a picture of someone who inspires you
day 17 - a picture of something that has made a huge impact on your life recently
day 18 - a picture of your biggest insecurity
day 19 - a picture and a letter
day 20 - a picture of somewhere you'd love to travel
day 21 - a picture of something you wish you could forget
day 22 - a picture of something you wish you were better at
day 23 - a picture of your favorite book
day 24 - a picture of something you wish you could change
day 25 - a picture of your day
day 26 - a picture of something that means a lot to you
day 27 - a picture of yourself and a family member
day 28 - a picture of something you're afraid of
day 29 - a picture that can always make you smile
day 30 - a picture of someone you miss

day 1

day 01 - a picture of you and 10 facts



me 2 years ago in San Fransisco... one of the very few pictures with me alone.



• I was born and raised in Southern California
• I lived in Santa Barbara for about 6 years....I miss it
• I love my dogs... even if they are extremely annoying at times
• I currently live in New York, but hate it.  I want nothing more than to live in California again
• I had my first child this past January...i love her more than words could ever begin to explain
• If I had my choice, my only method of transportation would be by bicycle
• I love creativity...fashion, design, art, photography...any form.  I, however, am not very creative.  Its something I'm working on.
• I don't eat pork...its not a religious thing... I really just don't like the taste of it.  and its not very good for you
• I love to travel and learn about nouns...I hope Tenley takes after me in this aspect
• Its hard for me to open up and talk about my feelings.  I don't want to be the girl people think, "omg, does she ever shut up about herself?", and in avoiding that I become the girl who is cold and closed off... I'm working on this too. :\

That was a lot easier than I thought it was going to be.  I'm pretty impressed I was able to think of 10 things to share... I was worried I wouldn't be able to.  woohoo!  Tenley is "woo"-ing me now...and by "woo-ing", I mean she is saying, "  woo  woo woo woo"...which means, "momma...pay attention to me!!"

30 days

So I thought I would try this out because it will do a couple of things. 

a) get me to think a little more about taking pictures and the pictures I take. 
b) get me to be a little more regular with my blogging, which is something I want to do
c) help myself put myself out there just a little bit more... sharing is caring... but its a bit hard for me to do sometimes.

here it goes!

day 01 - a picture of yourself and ten facts
day 02 - a picture of you and the person you have been closest with the longest
day 03 - a picture of the cast from your favorite show
day 04 - a picture of your night
day 05 - a picture of your favorite memory
day 06 - a picture of a person you'd love to trade places with for a day
day 07 - a picture of your most treasured item
day 08 - a picture that makes you laugh
day 09 - a picture of the person who has gotten you through the most
day 10 - a picture of the person you do the most ****** up things with
day 11 - a picture of something you hate
day 12 - a picture of something you love
day 13 - a picture of your favorite band or artist
day 14 - a picture of someone you could never imagine your life without
day 15 - a picture of something you want to do before you die
day 16 - a picture of someone who inspires you
day 17 - a picture of something that has made a huge impact on your life recently
day 18 - a picture of your biggest insecurity
day 19 - a picture and a letter
day 20 - a picture of somewhere you'd love to travel
day 21 - a picture of something you wish you could forget
day 22 - a picture of something you wish you were better at
day 23 - a picture of your favorite book
day 24 - a picture of something you wish you could change
day 25 - a picture of your day
day 26 - a picture of something that means a lot to you
day 27 - a picture of yourself and a family member
day 28 - a picture of something you're afraid of
day 29 - a picture that can always make you smile
day 30 - a picture of someone you miss

look what I got

So I have been trying to find ways to better understand how to use my camera and I got some books!

I've started reading the second one and it is really helping!  I have also taken my camera off of auto completely and am shooting everything in manual.  I still don't think I have a very creative eye yet and its hard for me to find things to shoot to test out different apertures and shutter speeds, but I'm getting there.

I also signed up with picnik, which is a great free photo editing sight.  I really wanted to get Adobe Photoshop CS5, but its really expensive and I am just starting out after all.  If I move more seriously into photography, then I might shell out the cash, but for now, picnik is juuust fine. : )

there is always something

On most days I come to my blog and I open up 'New Post' and I stare at a blank page.  I often times have SO much that I want to share on document but I never know where to start, so I guess I'll start small. 

My parents have been in town for the past week and a half.  They have been out and about visiting New York City almost everyday.  Tenley is still so little that travelling around is still a little bit difficult.  It would be easier if she didnt breastfeed, but she wont take a bottle for the life of her and I refuse to give her formula.  I've been a little bit jealous to say the least, so two days ago (on tuesday) I decided we are going out!  We got tickets to visit the Statue of Liberty and Ellis Island, sounds fun right?  The only problem it that it must have been the WORST day EVER to take a two and a half month old out. 

Since I live in New York, I have the benefit of public transportation, which is nice.  So we took one train to Hoboken and took a light rail to Liberty State Park.  Only, when we got to the park, it's about a mile and a half hike from the park to the port to get on the boat.  Normally there is a shuttle that goes from the light rail to the port, at least thats what a sign said, so we waited....for about 45 minutes (missing our boat to get to the island) in the pouring rain and wind.  It was miserable.  Tenley was screaming because she was hungry.  There was no indoors for me to feed her.  We were all soaking wet...except for Tenley, which was good.  Finally we decided to hoof it to the port. 

20 minutes later we go there and were told that due to budget cuts, there are no more shuttles but the state didnt take down any of the signs.  Major Fail New Jersey....but they were nice enough to let us on the next boat.  We went to the islands, learned some history.  I couldnt really pay much attention to everything becuase Tenley was still pretty fussy so I kind of sat back while everyone else got to learn and read and have fun.  Then we left.

On the train ride home Tenley hit a milestone.  I was making noises with my mouth to try and entertain her and I made the sound with your lips when your mouth is closed and you blow air out of it.... I dont know what you call it.  the motorboat sound I guess...?  and SHE COPIED ME!!!  it was the absolute. cutest. thing. eveeerrrr!!!!!!!!!!  now she does it at least once a day every day.  I LOVE IT!  The day was one of the most miserable, stressful days every for me...but that made it all worth it!

Saturday I had planned to go to the Museum of Natural History with my parents and Tenley.  My husband was with us on tuesday and it was miserable...he wont be there on Saturday to help.  So I definitely think I'm going to be staying home that day. : (  I really wanted to go too.  Oh well... I guess Ill have to stay home and make crazy noises with my mouth all day to Tenley can copy me. : ) 



tenley letting mommy practice with her camera



Warmth

In my head, I complain a lot.  about everything.  the weather.  my husband.  my dogs.  work.  money.  my fat belly.  my fat ass.  my huge thighs.  my stretch marks.  the food I ate.  everything.  the fact I complain.  I wish I didnt. 

I had some visitors today (finally) and the weather was SO nice!  It felt so good.  It made me think about all those little things and how they are just little and insignificant.  so I've come to one conclusion.

I need more sun.  It makes me feel good.  It makes my heart happy.  Its my lifeblood.

Thats all today.  I just wanted to check in and make myself known...again.  That, and my pea is waking for a sweet sweet five minute slumber.  So now I must bathe and bed her :)  tata

looking back...

There are so many things I want for my life right now.  I want a new fancy lens for my camera that I dont know how to work so I can take close close pictures and have them come out not blurry.  I want to get photoshop so I can edit the not-so-fancy pictures taken with my fancy camera I dont know how to work.  I want a new wardrobe that will fit my post-baby-still-holding-onto-20-extra-pounds-of-baby weight.  I would like to say goodbye to this baby weight.  A number of things.

But.  Looking at my life right now, there is only one thing I wish I could have.  I wish I could go back to be a better friend to my friends.  I had a MAJOR attitude problem when I was younger.  I think I had Napoleons Complex because I was always the "short friend".  Always the friend who, when there was a car full of people, had to sit on a lap of someone else.  I was mean to people.  I called people names.  I was angry at everything and wanted the world to know.  I took out that anger on a lot of people for no good reason.  I was judgemental, opinionated to the point that everyone was wrong if they didnt agree with me.  I was a bitch.  I HATE that I was like this.  I really do.  I didnt make friends easily and the people that I was friends with probably thought I was annoying 99.9% of the time. 

I was also the girl that, once she got a boyfriend, forgot about the rest of her life and the rest of her friends.  So the few friends that I did actually make would soon get tired of my antics and leave me in the dust.  Or I would leave them in the dust. 

I am also a really bad friend and I NEVER keep in touch with people.  Partly because my years of not being able to make friends or keep friends has crutched me to being really akward with small talk.  I cant hold a conversation about everyday life for the life of me.  I never know what to say.  I dont talk about myself because I dont want to be the "girl who only talks about herself".  I dont ask prying questions about other people because I dont want to be the "nosey girl".  I dont know the boundries.  I dont know my limits.  I hate it. 

I worry that these traits will be passed on to my daughter.  That she will see mommy has no friends and not know how to nurture relationships in her own life.  It terrifies me.  It scares me.  It makes me sad.  I hate it.

If there is one thing in my life I could change.... it would be that. 

I am going to leave with something that makes my heart happy and makes me hopeful for my future.  Seeing this makes me forget all my past and lose track of all the wants I have right now.  It takes me to a place where my heart wants to explode and I'm lost.  Dazed and blinded by the amount of love that seems through every pore of me. 

procrastination

Hello, my name is Chrystal and I am a procrastinator....

I take a lot of pictures of my little pea.  Like, a lot.  Which is fantastic!  I know you're asking, "what's the problem with that?"  The problem is - I NEVER upload them onto the computer.  ever.  Part of the reason I think I never upload them is because I don't have a real computer.  I should rephrase that.  I have a real computer, but it's about a billion years old and... it doesn't have the internet.  I'm laughing at myself right now because I just aged myself to an age that doesn't correlate with my chronological age.  The only computer I have in my house is a tiny little Netbook.  The other reason I think I never upload them onto my tiny, precious little Netbook is because I don't have anything to edit my trillions of pea pictures with, save for the "paint" program.  haha! 

I am an old soul.  I will admit that.  I'm OK with it.  I even kind of like it.  I think it makes me unique.  But, geez Chrystal.  The young self inside of the old self is shaking her head with disappointment.  I really need to get my act in gear.  Soon..... I will get my act in gear.  After I clean my house, feed the pea, do the laundry, feed the pea, eat some lunch, change the pea, feed the pea....  Geez my list is long.  I'll get to this computer situation... I will. 

Here are a couple of goodies that are probably super old... but I hope you (my thousands and thousands of followers....not) enjoy them. 

me and the Hubs at his brothers wedding... years ago

4 months preggers...I thought I was so HUGE!  ha!

Tenley yelling at me to take those darn mittens of her hands

she's my squishy

and I love her so.  Everyday has been a new adventure in the z household and I cant help but wake up everyday thinking, "what has this little pea got in store for me today?"  She never ceases to amaze me how quickly she is developing.  From the moment she was born, she has been able to hold her head up and just a few days later she was able to scoot herself around.  Now, she is smiling and beginning to "talk" to her mama and papa. 

My little lovebug is sleeping so peacefully in her swing (which is the only place right now she is willing to close her baby blues) and I am enjoying some quiet mommy time thinking to myself what I am going to make for dinner.  So until next time...

 

Making a silly face at daddy... or probably getting ready to cry

 

she sure does love her some mommy : )

***dont mind my pictures... I have nothing to edit them and like I said earlier... I am still trying to figure out how to use my camera***

hello world

so.... this is my first blog.  I have no agenda with this blog.  This is really just a place for me to unplug my thoughts, life and heart.  A forum for my creativity....or the discovery of my craetivity.  A place for me to document the upbringings of my little pea, Tenley.  I am completely new at this whole thing and have no clue what I am doing. 

Recently my life has chagned a full 180 degrees.  I went from being a young, single, career oriented girl from Souther California to a still young, married, stay at home mommy finding new hobbies and living in New York.  All in a matter of a year.  I guess it should be noted that when I say 'single', I mean not married; but the Hubs and I have been exclusive for about 5 years. 

What hobbies am I dabbling in?  Well, for starters, I got a camera... a fancy one used to take fancy pictures... one that I haven't the foggiest clue how to work.  But I'm working on it.  I have quite a few freinds who are pretty savvy at using their lens and I hope to use them to advance my learning.  I also an cooking.  I cooked before, creatively, but now that I am home.. every.single.day... I am now branching out a little bit and am goaling myself at learning a new recipe a week.  We have quite a few food resrtictions in my little homestead.  The Hubs is allergic to seafood (bust) and I have to stay away from dairy because my little pea is lactose intolerant and I'm being a good mama and using what God gave me to feed her.  So needless to say, cooking has been interesting. :)  I guess those are the two main hobbies I have... I also love to read (which I rarely have time to do), shop (again...time.  Plus money with this one is lacking), and am beginning to whip my tush into shape with a little help from the P90x videos.  I'm sure the hell I'm about to partake in with this little venture will be well documented. 

I am excited to start making a record of my life and to see, physically, how my life is going to change and evolve in the days, weeks and years to come.  I am even more excited to document all of those moments that will leave me breathless about my life and love(s).